1. there are bees in the walls.
2. seriously, aren’t you scared of slipping down the slope of smiting all that lies at your fingertips because you were afraid of all of your own love? get it together, man.
3. why do you have so many prospectuses? isn’t your bag heavy? (it is, and the space I cleared for free pens was promptly filled by an entire tin bucket, for fuck’s sake. I still don’t have enough prospectuses.)
4. god is queer and god is trans and I can see wings and impossibly large light pushing to burst out from the chests of my queer and trans friends. isn’t it wonderful? god, you’re all so fucking wonderful I think I might kiss you all until we don’t have to think about the future anymore.
5. my friend asks what I’ll do if the universities ask me about my hobbies and I respond that if all the universities come to life and ask me about my hobbies I will tell them about my favourite past-time, which is, of course, training raccoons to become wedding entertainers who do party tricks such as making paper snowflakes that look like prince harry. what, there’s no raccoons in england? what’s that got to do with anything?